Do not compare their worst to your best. I do not recall where I first heard that statement; I only recall thinking that it belonged in a Windows and Mirrors piece. As I look forward to the Better Angels workshop in September (see the description on page 2 of the July 2019 Voter), this seems an appropriate time to ponder it further.

On the surface this may not seem like a diversity topic. It is not about race, religion, ethnicity, gender, age, sexual orientation,
ability/disability, health, citizenship status, or, well, anything in particular. Except that it is about all of them.

The column heading Windows and Mirrors for All is gratefully derived from a wonderful essay by Emily Style, “Curriculum as Window and Mirror.” Style states that “education needs to enable the student to look through window frames in order to see the realities of others and into mirrors in order to see her/his own reality reflected.” People of all ages need both windows and mirrors with which to view the world, but too often we only have mirrors.

As adults, we have no curriculum, no teacher to structure our vision of what we see and hear through windows. When we look through windows, or listen to stories wafting out those windows as we pass on the street, figuratively speaking, we may see and hear things that we disagree with, things that we are offended by, things we don’t understand. We must make our own interpretations, structure our own responses.

This is when that opening statement can be useful: Do not compare their worst with your best. Returning to what Style said, we need “to see the realities of others.” This does not happen with a quick glimpse, a soundbite of someone all hyped up at a rally, a headline, or a talk show rant. Wherever the starting point, we need to explore the why of what people say, not just the what. Certainly some of the most visible ranters are provocateurs, but millions of ordinary people
sincerely hold widely divergent opinions on a multitude of topics. Why?

I once heard a speaker reflecting on implementing the Five Whys process he had learned from a Toyota executive in his home. This process says that when you have a problem you ask why five times, working back through multiple stages of
causation.

Try asking why for five steps back when a position puzzles you, or a topic challenges you. It could be a useful tool. If you can’t answer a why question, try narrowing the question or finding something on the topic to read. Reading is helpful even when you think that you know what you think about a topic. A recent article in The Atlantic about the country’s immigration dilemma has raised perspectives and problems in this complex issue that I had not considered before. It never helps to stop listening (theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2019/04/david-frum-how-much-immigration-is-toomuch/583252/).

We must also look closely in the mirror and seek to discern what someone else might see in our reflection. Too often I am troubled by the language used by partisans on both ends of the spectrum.

See you in September at the Better Angels workshop.